What Doesn't Kill Me, Doesn't Kill Me
by ASongInMyHead
Summary: Unrelated E/É drabbles loosely based on various Next to Normal songs.


**Prelude**

She wakes up to the sun on her face and the pleasant smell of dirt and grass. He's looking at her with a strange smile, a hand raised to shield his eyes from the sunlight. She didn't mean to doze off, and the food she packed for the picnic lies untouched. She is about to apologize, when he takes her hand and presses it gently to his lips.

**Everything Else**

"Have a nice day, ma'am," Éponine says to the businesswoman as she passes her a coffee. The woman grabs it and walks away without tipping or even saying thank you.

_Wow, fuck you too._

It was a shit job, but honestly, she'd do anything to make money. Azelma, Gavroche, Mathieu and Aousten still lived in their parents' one bedroom apartment, crashing with Éponine when they could. But if Éponine wanted to one day support her siblings, she would have to continue to work two fulltime jobs.

She dons her false smile as the next costumer approaches. He's a handsome young man with an intelligent sparkle in his eyes.

"What can I get you, sir?" She asks.

He stares at the board for a moment. "What do you recommend?"

"Uh…" Éponine cannot think of a time when a customer has asked for an opinion. "The Caffé Americano is probably my favourite."

"Alright. A large Caffé Americano, please," he replies.

Éponine smiles turns real and she makes the espresso. She steals another look at him while at the coffee machine and is pleased to find that he's staring right back. The man pays for his coffee and she hands him the paper cup and her phone number.

**Who's Crazy?**

"I know it's you," Enjolras hisses as Éponine reloads her gun. "Covering your hair and binding your breasts might fool them, but I know you too well."

She ignores him and continues to work on her weapon.

"This is madness 'Ponine, go back home. I will not have your blood on my hands."

Éponine drops the gun and whirls around. "You're here, and so's my brother. I ain't gonna wait for either of you to die, and that ain't mad at all."

Enjolras sighs. "Alright. But be careful and stay to the back."

Éponine grins and runs back to the front of the barricade.

**He's Not Here**

"I know you don't love me."

"Oh?"

"I know you're with me because you can't have him."

"I'm sorry."

"That's okay. I'm used to loving people who can't love me back."

**Superboy and the Invisible Girl**

Enjolras watches the girl follow Pontmercy to the Musain night after night. Pontmercy is a fool in so many ways, but Enjolras literally cannot understand how he doesn't notice where the poor girl's affection lies. Her eyes are lifeless and her cheeks are sunken; he knows that it is for those like her that he fights.

One night he passes by her and grips her hand gently. Her eyes widen and she struggles to flee.

"Wait," he hisses. "You deserve a don't deserve a life spent pining for him."

"Don't pretend to know me, m'sieur," she wrenches herself from his grasp and disappears.

The next time he sees her, she is dying in Pontmercy's arms.

**Make Up Your Mind/Catch Me I'm Falling**

You fuck like it won't last. You bite her shoulder and she scrapes her nails down your back as she comes. You wake the next morning with entangled limbs and angry red marks and you laugh. Sometimes she disappears for days without speaking to you, but you're used to it by now. She always returns, albeit disheveled and secretive, but that's just the way things are. You welcome her into your embrace and the cycle continues.

**Song of Forgetting**

The year is 1973 and he's in a taxicab in Berlin when he sees her crossing the street.

"Pull over," he shouts at the driver. He throws money to the front seats and scrambles out of the car. "Hey! Éponine!"

He catches up to the girl who is looking at him with confusion. "I'm sorry, do I know you?"

"No," Enjolras gasps, not over the shock of seeing her again. "Well, you did. A very long time ago."

Éponine is beginning to look frightened. "I have to go, please leave me alone."

"_Please_," he can feel his heart begin to beat with panic. "Please remember. Paris. The barricades, we died there. And, and we… we were in love. Please."

"Leave me alone," she whispers again, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. She runs and disappears into the downtown crowd. Enjolras watches her go and does not chase after. He never sees her again and always wonders if she really didn't remember their other life, or if she was running away from it.

**Hey**

_"This is Éponine Thénardier. Leave a message after the tone and I'll probably reply at some point."_

_Beep._

"Hey, it's me. You haven't been returning my calls, I just wanted to make sure you're okay. Well, I'm sorry. I know you're not okay. Listen, it's been a week since Gav's funeral and you really need to talk someone. R told me he saw you at the bar and said you were pretty smashed. I mean, he was too, which is why he didn't say anything to you. But that's normal for him, and it isn't for you. Please, 'Ponine, if you won't talk to me, talk to someone. One of our friends or a therapist, anyone, _please. _We're worried for you. I'm worried for you. Okay, bye. I love you. Please call me back."

* * *

_Thanks for reading! I will probably write a follow up at some point, for the songs that I didn't use._


End file.
